School begins

Today was our first day of school. It was long, and slow; but nonetheless I was excited to have started and don’t have a complaint about the class. Other than one person, I think we have a good class, and I think that we will do really well and work together cohesively. I’m really excited for what is ahead. We haven’t even done anything yet, and I’m ready for it to get here. Of course I say that now as I do not really have any real stresses yet – but, that’s ok.

the time here is still rather hard, as I very much feel seperated from most people, and quite alone. I was thinking of doing a white rope, or possibly green rope, but, I don’t know how much I really want to do either. It seems like the rope programs here aren’t all that great. Like most people don’t even have to really do anything to get them. The chapel ropes can get them in a couple weeks, the green ropes, they never really seem to know what is going on, and have a bad rep. I don’t want to be one of them. But, at the same time, I know it will help me to get Below the Zone, which I really want. Do I do this simply to aid myself in advancement? Or do I not do it? Do I do it in attempt to change the perception? One thing I was really against doing green rope for, in addition to the stuff already stated was that I can not march people worth anything!!!! I really can’t. SO, that mostly leaves me with white rope, which I should probably just do.

Starting school

Got here about a week ago. It’s kinda like the beginning of basic all over again, as the newbies, the upper weeks people think it’s funny to make fun of us; but whatever.  As if they weren’t here before.

This past week has been really boring. We just do details all day. It usually consists of like 2 hours of cleaning, then multiple hours of looking like we’re cleaning. We walk around cleaning the same tile 20 times. We went to MedRed once – not really sure what it is, but, just an outside detail. We worked till like 1, then just sat inside watched TV/ slept till about 4.

The first weekers always have details for the weekend, too. But, this time we don’t have to make it look like we’re doing something. We do our work, then finished. Some of us also had CQ. Pretty much, we made sure people don’t go out the fire exit. Eight hours worth of making sure people don’t go out the fire exit. We couldn’t read anything but military related stuff…. Not that ANYBODY follows ANY of the rules here. It’s pretty hard to actually have integrity in so many of the aspects of life.

A few of us went to church this evening. It was ok. My ears hurt a lot afterwards. It was so freakin loud. I didn’t really like the sermon either. I was having difficulty following the logic of the preacher. I really miss going to a Baptist church. One more simple, yet deep. I feel like there’s no one here I can really connect with on the level I need to in order to keep me motivated and challenged spiritually. It’s weird, because when I was at college, I was surrounded by Christians, but I felt unchallanged there, too. I’m really going through a withdrawl in stimulation. I need a good solid person who can hold me accountable and challenge me daily. Not that I don’t have good friends here… but, I have this feeling that once we get into the phase II / III, where we can go off base/ drink, etc, I’m going to become more introverted and separate from the group of friends I hang out with.

Anyway, overall, time here has been ok. I’m glad we’re entering the second week. School starts on Friday for me… 5 more days!!!

process continues

Thank you God for the (relative) quickness of my med approval. It sure was hard for me to try to have patience. I don’t think I really did that Good of a job – but I was told it actually progressed quicker than it normally does. I went through and finished up my inspect… got my finger prints taken, and signed up for 4 potential jobs. They are defenitly ones that i would never have anticipated doing, but, somehow, they made my list. first, i have aerospace medical (which is what i really want to do); second, histopathology, third, biomedical equipment, and fourth electronic security system analysis. when i talked to my recruiter, i asked when he thinks i could leave “with what you put down… next year.” This was not what I wanted to hear. but, I kind of already knew it.

I’m a bit confused as to where I’m going in respect to where I should be going. God seemed to close all the doors for me and post a few “do not enter” signes along the way  when i was wanting Security Forces. First, i had a date:17 Feb… didn’t pass Meps. no go. Before heading back to meps 2nd time, i was told “don’t do security forces”. Couldn’t lift 80lbs.  Seemed like it just wasn’t supposed to happen. Turns out, i didn’t need to lift 80 lbs. only 70 – which i did. security forces was on my list. I didn’t pick it. I had been warned by 3 people during my journey NOT to do SF. So, i figured if i didn’t put it on my list, i was safe. Two days later. My recruiter calls. “there’s a cop job in april – do you want it?” God?!?!? What is this? I fully believe that the closer relationship one has with God, the better chance there is for calling on Him in a quick time of need. However, my relationship has been slacking to say the least. I prayed – defenitly not expecting a sign in neon lights to appear revealing my answer. And deceided to turn it down (pretty sure if the offer was for Feb, i would have taken it).  It’s hard – real hard. Not knowing when my date will come, and not wanting to wait forever as I likely will, But, I’m trying hard to trust God.

In the meantime, I’ve got my run time down to <13 minutes for a mile and a half. Not bad, if i do say so myself… but, my goal is still 10:55… that’s over a minute off a mile of what i have have been doing.But, the good thing is i’ve been running on a treadmill, which i think gives you a higher time. For some reason, I can never seem to run as well on those! My pull ups, I can do about one. I am aiming for 5, but, am constantly working on those, too. Sit-ups, I forsee surpassing my requirement for that, and pushups, i need to increase by about 25 for two minutes. I can only do like 15, but, they are different from the way I am sort of used to doing.

change of plans – again

So, i decided to go back to enlisting.

on a different note. My facebook phone number is to the white house. My friend was trying to find my phone number, and called it
Pretty much made my week.

Officer

So, I had this sudden grand plan: join the air force! I had it all planned out. I went and took the asvab – did quite well, i must say. Went through meps (yuck)… and that is where i got stuck. Because i have what many like to refer to as “white coat syndrome”…  I had a hold on my records, and had to get some paperwork done. So much for enlisting 27 Feb! So, I called up my uncle to ask a few questions. Well… let’s just say, I never got around to asking any of them, as he spent the entire time convincing me I needed to apply for OTS instead of enlisting! MAN!!!!
Now, I am just confused. I never really wanted to go in as an officer – I am much more of a hands on kind of person. Yeah, I don’t mind the little extra responsibility, but I’ve never really wanted to be the person in charge of anything. And that is kind of what i think of when i think of officers. I just don’t knwo if it’s me. But, now everyone else is agreeing – I have a degree… don’t go enlisted!
Ok, I may be crazy, but I’m not stupid. I can not turn down the advice of 4 military career individuals, most of whom i think know my personality.
Now that that’s settled, a few other issues. 1 – there’s an interview for this thing! HELLO! scared! don’t like interviews. at all. 2 – I had a bill go to collections. Oh yeah- a bill that I didn’t even owe! They billed my insurance company… the insurance company said “yeah right… you’re only going to get 89.77! (out of the 364 they asked for)”. so, we go that payed off… then Borgess sent the remainder to collections! now, i have to get this off my record, as it will hinder my officer application process. oh dear!

Stereotypes

Today I had a conversation with a lady about stereotypes & language, mostly relating to the hispanic population. I heard her call her nephew “mijo,” and I had heard the term before (mostly through my grandmother always calling me “mijita”); so I asked her what exactly it meant. I guess it doesn’t have much of a translation other than a term of endearment… or like “little one”. Probably like “bud” or something. 
Anyhow, she was saying how she isn’t bilingual, that she has picked up much of her spanish through the years and visiting other countries. She told me a couple stories of how she was stereotyped for her ethnicity. A friend called her for a pronunciation of a word, and when she said she didn’t know, the lady was shocked and replied with “well, aren’t you Mexican”? Or another friend once asked her what her family did to celebrate Thanksgiving. She told them they made turkey tacos and then danced around a Sombrero to give thanks. (before clarifying they make turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, and pumpkin pie, just like everyone else). Why do we assume that Americans of various ethnic backgrounds embrace everything of their own culture? And even more, why do we get so shocked when we find out they do not.

I found it interesting, not that I haven’t talked to people who have experienced such things before, but, I usually end up with the complete opposite experience. Although my language abilities were not passed down through my family, I do consider myself mexican american, and I do speak some spanish … however, even when people know this, rarely do I get asked how to say something, a meaning, or anything else.

Cleanliness

So, my parents had their small group meetnig at our house this week. My mom stresses over cleaning. I don’t understand why we do this. I mean…. our house isn’t dirty. It’s not spotless, but people do live in the house!!! Seriously. I don’t think anyone is going to think negatively of us because we have a couple of cans of paint on the floor in the dining room… we’re painting our garage. Or if the newspaper is sitting on the kitchen counter…. we subscribe to the paper. If there are dishes and pans in the sink… we eat…. go figure. I guess I just don’t understand why anytime anyone comes over (and not just our house, I know other people do the same thing), but, a major deep cleaning has to happen. Do we judge people when we go to their house? If we do… shame on us. If not why do we automatically assume everyone else will judge us, and if they do… that’s their problem. People do live in the house! 

I have an interview Monday morning, and one on Tuesday as well. the further along I get in job application processes, the more I feel I don’t want the job. Funny as it was a great job before I had to go through the process. Really, I think I subconsciouly try and convince myself that I do not want it that way if  I get turned down for it, it’s not that big of a deal. But, then, if I do, I have to try and reconvince myself I did want it. Really, I just need to suck it up and keep remembering why I wanted it. So, here it is:

• Camp Arroyo: Monday @ 1145am (Cali is 2 hrs behind, right… that would suck if I were still in bed… I mean in the middle of my errands… when they called)
• Sierra Nevada Journeys: Tuesday morning (or Thursday @ 4pm) … pretty amazing considering I just sent in my application like half hour before she emailed me back… I don’t think I’m that good!
• Nature’s Classroom: uh… faxing in application tomorrow!

jobs and family events

I am now sitting awkwardly on a tub in the middle of my room against the window. The power cord does not quite reach… but, it’s where the vent is. I’m not quite sure why my room seems to be the only one not producing heat. I feel like I’ve entered the freezer every time I walk in. Each night when I go to the bathroom, I think I should move in there – nice and toasty. Not too hot, but, enough to keep my toes from turning blue.

I got a call from my friend the other day strongly urging me to send in my resume / application for Nature’s Classroom. I think more than anything, I needed to get that phone call to tell me to quit being lazy and just send stuff in. I’m submitting (in total) 3 applications. Camp Arroyo in Cali (perks: I have a friend in Cali… [depsite the 4 hour distance] $400+/wk, really good environmental conservation program). Nature’s Classroom (perks, New England area – i love new england! cons: pay not as well). Sierra Nevada Journeys (Have scholarship program for schools [i really like that], more outdoor living education (backpacking, leave no trace, etc), $400/wk, never lived in nevada…). I hate applying to places, cuz i hate getting people to do references for me. Also, I’ve never had to turn down a job before… I hate applying for a job with the knowledge that in a couple days, i’ll be interviewing for a different one. Really, I don’t know which one I want to do most. Ultimately, if it works out, I’ll probably just end up following Ginnie if we both get accepted to the same ones. Which is another issue… knowing we both applied to two of the same places…. what if she gets accepted and I don’t / vice versa. I hate the comparison of that. I know I shouldn’t, but really, how could I not help it. Anyway, I guess I just got to get over it, huh.

Yesterday, the family watched Chronicles of Narnia and cross-stitched … all of us! Dad’s been working on his for at least (no exaggeration) a decade. He’s good at it, he just does it so intermittenly. I really haven’t done cross-stitchings in a while… since early Hawai’i. and come to think of it… I don’t have any that I have done. i probably won’t keep this one either. don’t know what i’ll do with it, prob. mom will take it. i’ll keep the next one i do, though … the one daisy’s getting me for christmas

TO DO

It’s hard to believe I’ve been home a week. There’s so much to do … and unfortunately, I feel as though my motivation level negatively correlates with that!

• finish unpacking (5 days, and still not done!)
• finish laundry – 3 loads
• deposit check
• find mason jars
• Finish AC scrapbook
• Call Express
• Send in two more resume/cover letters
• Sort through my stuff / get rid of stuff
• Send out a few emails
• Find out about student loans
• Call to get computer fixed
• Read

ok, off to actually do something

Black Friday

So, we went out this morning. really, I just wanted to go to the library and Dillon’s to get food, but, Daisy decided she wanted something from Kmart… so, hadda go. Really, what she was getting was my christmas present to her. Oh, and I got dad’s present: Razor blades. Hey, that’s what he said he wanted…. $12 for a 5 pack! Then, we went to the library and dillon’s.  When we got back home, mom had gotten something when she was out … my Christmas present to her. I must say, makes shopping easy.  I never know what to get people… and only on occasion do I think of something, otherwise, really, it’s like if you don’t tell me… i won’t get you anything. I am not going to be obligated either!

So, today, I made pretzels… only I don’t really think I knew what I was doing as they defenitly inflated in the oven and ended up as like knot rolls since the holes closed. Whatever, they were good.

I really need to finish filling out job apps and cover letters!