Right now, I have a dilema… half my stuff is gone… being sent to UK. I bought a bike.. $400! and sent it away the same day! Hopefully to see it in one piece very soon! Anyhow, much of my clothese are gone as well. I am not one who needs a lot of clothes… but I do enjoy wearing clothes from time to time. Especially now that it’s getting cold. They are a good thing to have, I would suspect. In a few short days, I will be treking across east US to visit some friends. I don’t like to wait till the last minute to pack for such trips… but, I’m already short on clothes. If I pack, I have nothing to wear. THAT is my dilema. Sigh… what to do? But, on a positive note, if that is the greatest of the worries in my life right now, LIFE IS GOOD!
GOOD NIGHT

COUNTDOWN: 4 days till NJ, 7 days till MI, 13 till UK (14 till I arrive!),

It’s been 2 days home, and already we’re getting at it. Why must you take everything so personally? and why must you get offended at everything I say? No, I don’t need to talk to you ever day. No, I don’t need to see you all the time. Let me go.

182 days and counting!

Spent the day with B & L yesterday. I’ve come to the conclusion that my respect level for people drops when they try and convince people to do things they are against. I’m all about people asking me to go places I usually wouldn’t go – i.e. a bar. I’m even ok with people asking me once or twice if I want a drink. What I lack respect for, is if someone knows I do not drink, asks me to, and would actually allow me to do so without questioning me if I said ok. I have lived 24 years without engaging in many activities. would you really find joy in convincing someone to break that? Certain things, I don’t care… text messaging… i’m not against ever doing, i just have no desire. Sex, i will not – before I get (if ever) married. Drinking. I will not. Why would you let me? Don’t try and convince people to do things they are passionate about not doing. That’s a jerk move on your part.

So, today pretty much sucked. I started my period last night… I don’t usually keep track of it. Especially as I’ve been moving around a lot – I just will adjust to others anyway. I wasn’t feeling good this morning when I got to work. One of the nurses tried to put in a Rx for me, but, the inpatient pharmacy wouldn’t fill it because I was not checked in. So, I ended up going to the ER. It was over an hour and a half before anyone came in to see me. And over 2 hours before they gave me anything. The Dr – actually, I think he was a PA. Was a jerk. He was like “so, that’s why you’re here??” Excuse me that i have to work, and can’t just take soemthing and go to bed. Then he was like “well, I can’t really justify sending you home.” Did I ask you to send me home!? NO!! Give me some medicine! The only reason it didn’t worsen during that time was because they took so freakin long, and I fell asleep, which helped some. They did a urinalysis, too. Came back with really low bacteria count, appearently. Oh, then the PA was like “I understand”. Do you?! Seriously? Hmm.. either you’re implying soemthing  or YOU HAVE NO FREAKIN CLUE! Oh, and I don’t think it helps that the tampons I bought the other day were WAY too big. causing way more extra pain.

So, I’m not so much liking the class leader stuff for school. I have enough issues picking battles with people, I don’t need to be on them for the little things, too. i have learned over the years to be wise on things I get on people about… things that I believe strongly in (but feel is more of a ethical conviction rather than personal). Like honesty, UAD / DUI, respect, etc.  These things are important to me. But, now, I am told I have to get on people for little stuff – tuck your shirt in, turn in your paper, why weren’t you at post conference… the list goes on. While I am personally convicted to follow rules like these that are given to me… they are not what I consider high on my list. it doesn’t make the world lesser of a place if your shirt is not tucked in today. Granted it does make you a better person for doing it if you’re told.

Today I got to work in EKG.  I really thought it was going to be dull, but, I ended up getting to watch an echo, do a few EKGs, and help with a adenosine stress test. i learned about reading an EKG, and a cardiac pack – like a 24 hr ekg. It was intersting.

So, some of us went up to TN this weekend. It was really good. A LOT of driving… and eating crap (snack food). It was only 3 days, but it seemed like such a long weekend. Good to be back.

I got into a discussion with one of my cousins about deployment and dying. Pretty much, she threatened to kill me if I get deployed and die. Not really sure how that is going to work out, but ok.

We went hiking, and bowling, and got ice cream (of course then I returned my hyper 12 yr old cousin back to his parents!). It was good to see them. I don’t think I will be seeing them again any time soon.

So, I got my arm stuck behind a sliding door and a wall today. That was no fun. 2 nice cuts on my arm, and a bruised wrist. It scared the crap out of me… I didn’t know how far back the door was going to go, and I thought it was going to snap my arm. Ha, and to think not 5 minutes later… I was helping put a cast on someone.

Today was a good day. I helped remove (ok, I watched) two abscesses. It was NASTY!!!! Lots and  lots of puss. It was pretty sweet! I did a couple EKGs. Drew some blood. Took vitals on a pt who was having a sever reaction to ant bites.

I miss the starts. I was looking out at them tonight… and I see like 5. But, what is funny is that it seems that no matter how few stars there are out, certain constellations still show. I wonder if this is how they chose them. Those stars which would shine through the light pollution below. Crazy

I don’t understand.

Ok… so, if it doesn’t matter if you sleep with people… why are you saying that it’s special that your fiance has been with no one but you? what difference does it make? You just told me you can have sex for fun, and it not make a difference. There’s no meaning to it. But, that’s completely contradicting what you’re saying now. You say she didn’t lose her innocence… but, what does that even mean? Can’t she do what she wants with whomever… have a little fun.

GUYS

• Females in guy’s clothes

                           *Ties
                           *undershirts
                           * men’s buisness suits

• Wet hair
• Intelligence
• Honesty
• Clean shaven
• Walking around in underwear
• Thongs
• Really red lipstick
• Bondage

FEMALES

• Italians
• Accents

The weekend has come and gone… and nothing really exciting has happened, but, that’s ok. I like the break. I went to church this morning. It was good to finally go again… first time in like 12 weeks! I think i was like one of 10 people under the age of 65 there, but what can one expect from a traditional service? I miss the hymns. I miss fellowship, and I miss being around a group of people who understand me. Who support the things I believe in. Who agree with the things I do. That don’t make me feel so different and out of place every day. It was good to go. It was good to experience all that I have missed over the past few months! I am ready for the week.